A love song that laughs at perfection and finds devotion in every human flaw
When John Prine joined forces with Iris DeMent to perform In Spite of Ourselves on Live From Sessions at West 54th, they brought renewed life to a song that had already carved out a singular place in American songwriting. Originally released in 1999 as the title track of In Spite of Ourselves, the song reached the Top 30 on Billboard’s Hot Country Singles and Tracks chart and quickly became one of Prine’s most beloved late-career compositions. While the album marked his full return to recording after years of illness, this live performance captures something even rarer: the song not as a studio creation, but as a living conversation between two voices perfectly matched in spirit.
At its heart, In Spite of Ourselves is a subversion of the traditional love song. Where most romantic duets chase idealized devotion, Prine writes instead about chipped teeth, bad habits, and stubborn pride. The genius lies not in irony for its own sake, but in how plainly he asserts that love does not survive despite flaws, it survives because of them. In this West 54th performance, that philosophy becomes audible in the interplay between Prine and DeMent. Their voices do not blend in polished harmony. They spar, tease, and lean into each other’s imperfections, mirroring the very relationship the song describes.
Prine’s vocal delivery is conversational, almost mischievous. He sounds like a man letting the audience in on a private joke, one grounded in long familiarity rather than novelty. DeMent’s voice, by contrast, brings a plainspoken sincerity that anchors the humor. Her phrasing is earnest without being sentimental, giving emotional credibility to lines that might otherwise drift into novelty territory. Together, they strike a balance that few duets ever achieve: playful without mockery, affectionate without illusion.
The lyrics unfold as a catalog of domestic reality. There are no sweeping metaphors, no grand promises of forever. Instead, Prine celebrates shared habits, shared stubbornness, and the quiet agreement to stay. This realism is what gives the song its emotional durability. In the West 54th setting, stripped of studio gloss, the song feels even more intimate. The audience becomes a witness to something that resembles a marriage vow rewritten in plain language, spoken with a grin and a shrug rather than solemnity.
Culturally, In Spite of Ourselves stands as one of John Prine’s most enduring works because it articulates a truth many feel but few articulate: that lasting love is not an escape from human weakness, but a partnership forged within it. This live performance crystallizes that idea. It is not merely a duet. It is a shared worldview set to melody, delivered by two artists who understood that humor can be one of love’s deepest forms of honesty. In that moment on the West 54th stage, Prine and DeMent remind us that devotion does not require perfection. It only requires showing up, again and again, in spite of ourselves.
Great Songs